Don't Meet Me At Foxwood's

I could never live near a casino. Here's why...

1. I am not an Indian.

2. I believe in being "due". (Slot machines apparently do not)

3. Old people freak me out. (Can someone explain to me how in normal life I never see someone with an oxygen tank. In a casino I usually see at least 3)

4. Buffets hold so much promise, and always disappointing.

5. I am powerless against small Asian men. (okay, this only holds true in casinos. But for some reason any time the dealer is small and Asian I lose my money very fast. I am not saying it is the fault of Asians as a whole, but just these Asians. But think about it people, what are the odds. They are small. Which means they are tricky...tricky Asians)

6. Shiny things make me want to touch them. (I would be so busy touching all the shiny things in the casino I would never get to eat. Except at the buffet, {see point 4}.

7. I don't think it should cost 25 cents to pull a lever. (I just don't. I enjoy levers. Believe you me, I love levers. But 25 cents, for one pull. It seems like we are forgetting why we went into Iraq in the first place.)

That's all for now...but there are other reasons. That I will save for my trip to Vegas in March. That's right, I just listed reasons I hate casinos and then I am said I am going to Vegas anyway. Got a problem with that! (Don't hit me, I'm fragile {but in a manly way})