Number 18 in your programs, Number 17 in your hearts.

So today's post is a response to a friend of mine. She's got a great sports blog that you should totally check out. Apparently she has tagged me and therefor I must respond. So here it goes. It's in response to the question: What if I were a hockey player.

Team: New York Islanders
Uniform number: 18
Position: Goalie (butterfly style)
Nickname: D-Wall, Stretch, The Vacuum. Hoover

Dream linemates: (or in this case, back-up goalie) Chris Osgood. Good enough to back up but not good enough to take my job.
Rounding out the PP: NA
Job: Guy who passive aggressively guilts people into working harder. In charge of yelling "watch the guy in front". Stopping pucks. Having a cool helmet.
Signature move: Blocker save the pops the puck straight up and then i slap it with my stick to my teammate waiting up ice for a breakaway.

Strengths: Passing really well. Amazing ability to slash at people's ankles if they are standing in front of me. Able to catch a fly with chopsticks all karate kid style.
Weaknesses: Bad peripheral vision. Fear of getting hit in the face.
Injury Problems: Bad knees. Inability to look up for extended periods of time
Equipment: All black equipment so you can't see the puck it hits me. Kelly Hrudey style blue headband (I don't wear it. I just keep it with me for strength)

Nemesis: Jagr. The Capitals.
Scandal involvment: Saying "Seriously dude, shut the hell up" every time a reporter asked me how I felt after doing something bad.

Who I'd face in the Stanley Cup Finals: The Dallas Stars. They are so boring that everyone will be cheering for us.
What I'd do with the Stanley Cup after our victory: Take it to my old high school. Find the biggest dude and hit him with it.
Would the media love me or hate me: Love me. Because it would always make for a good story when I said I hated someone. Trust me. I would hate a lot of people.